Have been feeling really tired lately. I guess packing up my schedule to meet up with people has been taking its toil on me. Things have been quite frustrating too....I've been thinking about what to do for my friend's wedding - Hen's party, special item for dinner etc. and its been hard to get feedback and suggestions.
People are either away or busy such that nobody is really left to plan and I feel the responsibility has fallen into my lap. I'm so bad at making decisions and being away from Singapore really doesn't help in being updated about knowing what is nice and fun to do....do you know what I mean? I actually spent an hour googling on how to plan a Hen's night in Singapore and nice chill-out places to go to etc. without coming to any concrete plans. It doesn't help either when my usual friends in this group are not able to be part of the Hen's night.... so no planning kakis... The Hen's party is like 3 days away and there's still nothing planned.... :(
Plus, feeling uninspired, tired and missing my husband terribly really hasn't help in the entire situation. I actually dreamt that I was back in Germany last night and it felt so real that I was actually heart-broken to realize that I was still in Singapore....
So, I'm calculating. Are attending 2 weddings worth the trouble of:-
1. Physically separating from my hubby for more than 1 mth
2. Using up all my annual leave and taking unpaid leave
3. Squeezing up all my finances with the air-ticket and everything, when Stephan's having his tax course.....
The brides - one is on honeymoon, the other is busy with wedding prep, such that I've only met up with her once so far. Ahhh.... I'm not blaming anybody, but I really think this is the first and last time I will come back especially for weddings, now that I know how little time the couple would have.....
Being in Singapore is always difficult for me. I feel a sense of nostalgia cos I grew up here, but I know that now home is Germany. It feels like I'm so torn in two. Like don't know where I belong. On one hand, the food, language, family, friends etc...reminds me of home. On the other, I'm living out of a suitcase and this time, my hubby is not here, so my heart is in Germany.
I guess I'm just HOMESICK!!!!!!!! Help! Beanie, how? Really wish I can fly back to Germany NOW!
5 comments:
Dear mei mei,
nearly cried when I read this post. Am super tired today though so that might explain (had my 6 girls over for raclette last night and they enjoyed it so much that they didn't leave til midnight, plenty of washing up waiting for me at home now...). But then I cry all the time anyway so no news for you there... ;)
Yes, it totally is worth going to Singapore for a month!!! This year Stephan doesn't have time to go away on holidays anyway so it's good that you get to go away. All your friends must be so happy that you've made the effort to come all this way for their weddings. When I flew to my friend's wedding last year (when I stayed at yours after my Ibiza holiday) she kept hugging me and telling me how much it meant to her that I made this effort and your friends will always reserve a special little place in their hearts for you for doing that. And don't forget that a lot of people took up their annual leave to come to your wedding in Singapore from all over Europe because they wanted to spend that special time with you and my brother. And it was so worth it although both of you were really busy with the last preparations, too. Wouldn't change it for the world, it's meant to be one of the most special days in a couple's life (and you would know better about this than I do) and missing it would be such a shame.
Being separated from Stephan for a month must be hard (although I find it difficult to relate to this being his sister... hihihihihi.. nah, love him really...), I'm struggling with two weeks and am dreading the next three weeks without Holger. However absence makes your heart grow fonder so you'll cherish the times together even more now because both of you are being reminded how much you love and need each other. And hopefully this month means that Stephan had plenty of time to study so that you two will be able to have a bit of quality time together when you get back.
Just try to see the good times while you are out there. How long will it take you to get to eat ALL that lovely food again, see all your friends and your family. :) You are so lucky really so try to forget about the home sickness. It's not easy, I know, but you've gone through so much that you'll be able to do that, too. Not long to go and you two will be reunited again!
Bet that you are feeling fine already anyway by the time you read this. And I don't want to sound as if I'm 'talking down' on you either as it's not meant that way at all. Just want you to have fun with your friends and family and enjoy every minute of Singapore because in a couple of months (at the latest) you'll be missing it again, especially the food. ;)
Love you and miss you,
jie jie
Oh dear, that was a long one...
Hi Pris,
Sorry to hear that. Though I cannot share the same feelings but I hope that since you are unable to change the situation now, hope you will enjoy the rest of your stay in Singapore with your family and friends... till you are 're-united' with Stephan again. :-)
Take care, sista. Till we meet again next time... in whichever continent. :-)
CoRy
Dear Sabrina
Thanks so much for your lovely thoughts. I really appreciate your comments so much! They are always so straight from the heart, practical and useful! You really cld consider having a part-time job as "agony aunt"! Hahah.
I do feel MUCH better now! I think when I blogged this post, I was hitting an all-time low...so I'm really grateful and thankful to God that its over! Anyways, the Hen's Party turned out AWESOME! Can't wait to blog abt it! It was everything that Jen wanted it to be and everything went on SO SMOOTHLY!
Now, I'm basically focussing on the dinner plans on Saturday and after that its back to Germany for me in only a matter of days.... Its always like that I guess, when I'm getting used to a place, that's when I have to leave...haha, I shd't be too used to Sg, if not Stephan might start worrying that I'm not going back to him hahah..
Oh nice! Raclette wif yr 6 girls! Who are they?
Hey, thanks for sharing abt yr own experience abt flying down for our wedding. It really hits home when I realize the amt of the sacrifice in terms of opportunity cost and money it takes to be there for somemone's special day ! And all the more I can really appreciate it now!
Yeah Yeah! I'm entering my last full-week in Singapore and I know I will really sad to leave again! But being where God wants us to be - which is Germany for now, makes it so much easier.
Ok! I had a long one too!
You'll be seeing Anita n Werner soon! Aren't you excited?
Hi dear Cory!
I really enjoy and treasure every min in Singapore! I guess its just the first-time when I'm away from a loved one that makes it difficult. However, I feel so much better now! Actually I felt better after blogging this entry already! Hhaha, very therapeutic to blog! Mtg you was definitely a highlight of my trip too! Its just different when I get to meet people who share the same experience in Germany! Yeah, look forward to mtg again n u can share more of yr prison stories with me!
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